Adventures in Poo

We took our first outing together when Noah was around 3-4 weeks. As any new mom can understand, I had a need for a couple of new shirts. Since it was cold outside, we were using the "Bundleme" liner for the car seat, which is basically a really warm sheepskin covering to keep your baby nice and toasty. Well, we managed to forget to unzip the thing when we got him inside Old Navy, and after about 15 minutes of Nano strolling him around the store, he literally began to toast ... and then to fuss. We unzipped the thing, and pulled out a now red, crying baby. Poor little dude! We took him into a dressing room to nurse, since his 2 hour internal hunger alarm clock had gone off. When he was almost done nursing, I felt something wet on his clothes, and asked Nano, "Did he pee?" Just as Nano was about to reply, Noah ripped out a two-minute long wet one [pbfpbfbpfbpf], louder than Nano's reply. Then his back really started to turn wet...and yellow...and the poo started to ooze through his clothes. Somehow it seemed like there weren't enough hands to hold the baby, keep the poo away from our bodies, pull out a new outfit and change his clothes. Amazingly, I was able to ward off the yellow mustard flow long enough for Nano to pull out the change of clothes that we had miraculously had the foresight to pack. Yes, we were very clumsy, but we managed to get him into a clean diaper and clothes!

Then, just a few weeks ago, after our trip to Miami, we went to Cosi for lunch on a quiet Saturday afternoon. Nano ordered his standard sandwich, and I got my favorite salad. We had just purchased a new comfortable convertible carseat, convinced that Noah's infant seat was too uncomfortable, so we didn't have the old car seat to put him in while at the restaurant. We took turns holding him on our laps instead. We heard the telltale sound of a poo, and so we prepared to change him. I checked the ladies' room for a changing table, and while one was available, it was covered in dirty paper towels and nasty old poo. The men's room wasn't much better, so we decided to change him on the booth's bench instead. I laid out the diaper pad, placed Noah on it, and got the wet diaper off. Just as I was starting to clean up, [pbfpbfpbfpbfpbfpbfpbfpbf!], out shoots more projectile mustard! I looked over at Nano for help, but he had become incapacitated with raucous laughter. Everyone in the restaurant must have turned to look - if not for the sound of the poo, for Nano's guffawing. I tried to shield myself with the wipe, but of course, the poo got all over my hand and shot all over the diaper mat. By some stroke of luck, it did not get onto the booth (really, I swear). It took about 10 more wipes and 3 trips to the bathroom before we got that one all cleaned up...